Me, on May 14th: “OH MY GAWD YOU GUYS, THE COURTNEY STODDEN SEX TAPE DROPPED A FEW DAYS EARLY!!”

Weekend: Done.

Courtney is 20, and when she was 16 she married a dude who was – and presumably still is – older than her dad. Not sure how that works out legally, but hey, love sees no age, right? (cue my Woody Allen, Paul Walker, etc., rant in 3… 2… 1…)

Since then, Courtney has been on an E! True Hollywood Story episode about reality ex-wives, Tosh.0, and something called Couples Therapy for VH1 (among a few other things). And as of May 14, 2015, the world can see another side of Courtney via her “‘celebrity’ ‘sex tape’ ” Courtney Uncovered: The Courtney Stodden Sex Tape. Apparently, Courtney decided to take Vivid Entertainment up on their customary $1 million offer for celebrity sex tapes and plans to donate any proceeds to charity.

(Psst, Courtney, some news – most charities won’t take your porno money. It’s called sex-worker discrimination, and many adult performers and producers have run into trouble attempting to donate time and money simply because of the nature of their work. Here’s a camera interview I did with Vicky Vette and Julia Ann about it earlier this week, SFW)

courtney-stodden-vivid-sex-tape

(pictured: CS, image via Getty)

The whole “ ‘celebrity’ ‘sex tape’ ” genre bothers me.

It bothered me when Pam and Tommy Lee got their actual private property stolen. It bothers me today when Kim Kardashian acts miffed about the existence of her sex tape, which may document what was once a legitimately private tryst but legally had to be released by her for sales and distribution. (That’s a true fact) And it REALLY bothers me when Backdoor Farrah (NSFW) attempts to call her scene with James Deen anything other than run-of-the-mill porn.

Maybe it’s fun to think we’re seeing a celebrity caught with her panties down, like we’re getting a peek into something actually private. But in reality, absent a few rare instances happening decades ago, this genre of adult is nothing more than marketing and fantasy. Courtney included.

Because this video is just so hot and so intimate, there’s no SFW trailer for Courtney Uncovered that I can share with you. Instead, I give you this. You’re welcome.

 

Reprinted from UPROXX/FilmDrunk (5/15/15).

And ICYMI, you can read all my work featured on UPROXX/FilmDrunk com right –> here

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