I recently corresponded with a writer from Bustle regarding sex games — but like, fun games (not mind games or nefarious manipulations).

The prompt I received said: “I’m writing a piece about games/activities that can help someone explore their sexual desires in their relationship. If you’re interested in contributing, please *email* me your ideas. Thank you!”

Here’s my statement in full:

With a little bit of ingenuity, anything can be turned into a game – from goal setting at the gym to consensual sex play and exploration.

There are plenty of adult-specific games you can pick up at your local adult novelty shop or online from your favorite e-tailer. You might find one that perfectly meets your needs, or you might find inspiration to create your own game – which is where things could get really interesting.

Since just about anything can be a game, try formulating your own. Use teledildonic devices when you’re out and about to gently surprise your partner. Find secret ways of sexy “goal setting” on a daily basis, or establish little private rituals. Take a note from an old school playbook, and create some cards with tasks and points – winner takes all!

The most significant thing to remember with any sort of game play is consent, followed closely by refraining from shame. Because of wider social norms surrounding sexual miscommunication, it is difficult to open up about sexual desires. Be mindful of your partner’s comfort levels – as well as your own — as you introduce new games and activities.

Solid advice, if I do say so myself.

My insights were used in the piece right here — “9 Sex Games That Can Help Grow The Passion In Your Relationship.”

(pictured: typos)

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