Two little girls I know may be (read: are each) getting one of these from Santa this year. And while I get the innocence of children and we adults ruin everything while constantly yammering on and on about how we’re damaging and/or programing girls (because most toys are still very heavily gendered, and these are really heavily gendered “girl”) with problematic media and blah blah gets tedious… seriously?

Seriously, this toy?

Here’s what Target.com has to say about it:

The Puppy Surprise Popcorn and & Her Pups Set is perfect for the little dog lover in your house. Popcorn, the pretty plush dog, is about to become a mom. Will she have 3, 4 or 5 plush puppies? That’s the surprise. Soft and huggable, these stuffed animals are waiting to be natured, groomed and cuddled. Ages 3 and up. (here)

Let me be clear here. There are three mommahood-impending dog options – Popcorn, Zoey, and Sugar. Each one has an unzippable tummy, wherein a *surprise* number of  puppies is located. HOW MANY WILL THERE BE?

The answer is obviously three, four, or five plush puppies – surprise!

Issues related to the reproduction of motherhood, gendering, and plain ol’ anatomy are hugely obvious and monstrously significant here. And I, in my own way, am absolutely contributing to this. Because I bought two of these dogs ($24.99+tax each), both in the solid pink Zoey option, in the hopes that the puppy surprise is actually just color-coded, thus avoiding an epic-as-fuck fight between the five-year-old and three year-old come Christmas morning.

Surprise.

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picture: meh

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